You hear stories in 1st and 2nd Samuel about the humble beginnings of King David. He began as a humble shepherd boy and through his own faith, God's guidance and blessing, grew to eventually become the King of Israel. His story wasn't easy- there were many obstacles in his way. His rise to kingship is both impressive and inspiring; worthy of Hollywood. It's a great example of how God can grab a hold of your life when the odds are stacked against you, and yet He can take you places you'd never dreamed of. (If your heart is pure and you're obedient to Him)
David's entourage, his "Mighty Men", also came from humble beginnings. It says in 1 Samuel 22 that men who were in distress, debt or unhappy in life came to follow David. David didn't seek out the best qualified, most trained warriors to be on his team. The worst of the worst, the outcasts sought out and came to follow David while he himself was on the run from Saul. It was God's direction through David's leadership, that these men were "made" to be great.
1 Samuel 22:2
All those who were in distress or in debt or discontented gathered around him, and he became their leader. About four hundred men were with him.
Doesn't that sound very similar to the caliber of people who followed (and hung out with) Jesus?
Mark 2:15-17 (New International Version)
While Jesus was having dinner at Levi's house, many tax collectors and "sinners" were eating with him and his disciples, for there were many who followed him. When the teachers of the law who were Pharisees saw him eating with the "sinners" and tax collectors, they asked his disciples: "Why does he eat with tax collectors and 'sinners'?" On hearing this, Jesus said to them, "It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners."
The common thread to these two examples is that God can use absolutely imperfect people to do great things. In fact, I believe God prefers to work with people that know and readily admit that they don't have it all together, don't have all of the answers or know what to do next. It's in these lives (like yours and mine) that God will begin to restore and grow character and purpose.
Of course, this is purely my opinion, but a broken heart and spirit is easier to work with than an arrogant and closed off soul. There is meekness in brokenness. I think scripture will back me up on this.
Psalm 51:17 (New International Version)
The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise.
So, if you're not feeling like a "winner", that's alright. If you are genuine in your repentance and are open to being used as a conduit for the Lord's purposes, rest assured that He will eventually show up to call upon you.
Good Night
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